I finally own my dream dyson Hoover!!! (Seriously riveting post, read with caution )

Quick disclaimer, my life is so exciting and thrilling you might not be able to control yourself, this was your warning. This post is also a huge sign that I am getting older but if getting older means I will be THIS happy over a new hoover, it’s all good! 

(I’m not sponsored I’m just crazy)

I had a dream, and this dream was to own the v6 animal dyson. I have wanted one for years and never thought I would ever own one due to the crazy price tag.

The fact it’s light weight, cordless, has amazing sucking power, and is PURPLE. (My one is anyway!) You can see why this was on my list of life goals, pretty high up on the list actually. 

Fairly recently this fairy tale dream of mine came true, I bought my new best friend and lover…the animal dyson. Who needs Prince Charming when you can have a dyson?

I got a sweet deal as it was half price so I really couldn’t say no. I asked my other half if I should get it or not, as it was very frivolous. He thought it was too much money…but he didn’t say the word NO and I took that as “go for it baby, buy your dream hoover!” So bought it. And my life was closer to being complete.

I LOVE this Hoover! I can not believe how much cat hair and dust this little beauty is sucking up! I have a black carpet and a fluffy white cat, recipe for disaster, but not a problem with my new best friend. 

The compartment that holds the dust is tiny but where I’m hoovering so much more now as it’s really convenient and cordless it’s not been a problem, because its bag less too it’s a flick of a switch to empty the dust into the bin. And no more buying expensive hoover bags! So technically I’m saving money! That’s always a good thing! 

It takes quite a while to charge, 3.5 hours to be precise, but as it has it’s own docking station on the wall, it’s constantly charging ready for when I feel like doing the housework. 

Over all this is the best hoover ever, you need it in your life, it is stupidly expensive but worth every penny. 

Do you have a hoover obsession?! I’d love to hear in the comments below. 

The Secret Blog of a 30 Year Old

X X X X X 

Annoying things about the school holidays (rant)

As much as I adore my kiddies the school holidays are always dreaded. Yes we don’t have to be up early for the school run, yes I don’t have to make packed lunches, and yes we get to go out and have some fun together…. but this does not mean it isn’t stressful!!!!


I’m lucky enough to be self employed and although I get to choose my own hours, I still have lots of worked booked in that has to be done. If I don’t work I’m not paid so it can’t be avoided. Trying to find people to have the kids is a nightmare, my mum does help out but as she’s not living so close anymore I can’t just drop them off for a couple of hours. If I can’t find anyone the poor monkeys have to stay at home with me, plugged in their iPads to stop the fighting!! 


The school holidays cost me a fortune to keep the kids entertained, we’ll have parks days and days with friends but spending money is unavoidable! Petrol, picnics, ice creams, snacks…blah blah! I always do one big day out somewhere fun per every week they’re off school, don’t get me wrong I love every second, until I realise I spent double what I was supposed to and I’m skint for the rest of the week and have to live off the scraps in the freezer. 


I swear my kids eat double in the holidays what they usually would!!! If I hear the words “muuuuuum I’m hungry” one more time I’m going to scream. I also tend to have a house full of other peoples children in the holidays too, I really do love a house full but a weeks worth of snacks will be gone in just one day! And 8 little voices moaning “I’m hungrrrrrry” was far worse then 2 little voices, but at least they keep each other entertained.


Depending on which school holidays it is, this subject varies. If it’s a short half term, so only a week long, boredom isn’t a huge issue as I can handle a week keeping them occupied. Even a two week holiday isn’t too bad. The worst is the summer holidays, 6 loooooong weeks to try and keep busy. Towards the end they are tiered, bored and ready to go back to school!! 

I miss being alone

Where is my quiet half an hour to write my blog posts or catch up on some telly with a coffee?! Not gonna happen!!!!

House sufers 

Oh my poor poor house, trying to get my house work done with the kids around is a nightmare. Everytime I try and put a toy away it’s “noooo I’m playing with that!!!” Within seconds of hoovering there’s crisp and busicuit crumbs all over the carpets. I clean the bathrooms and my four year old boy wee’s all over the seat. I’ll wipe the kitchen sides down just my my daughter can go make herself a sandwich, leaving half a loafs worth of crumbs behind. After having a house full of kids it’s unrecognisable! 


Out of all my points this is the one that I truly can’t stand. When the kids are getting along it makes my heart melt, they play the cutest games together and I think they’re finally becoming friends. Then in one swoop the arguing starts “ITS MY TURN ON THE TV!!!!” “HE TOOK MY TOY!!!” “SHE HIT MEEEEEE!!!!” “MUUUUUMMMMM!!!!” It echos round my head and makes me want to bloody scream!! They fight over the most petty of things I just don’t understand!!!

What do you hate about the school holidays?! I’d love to hear in the comments below! Please no comments saying “aw this is so mean I love time with my children!” You are clearly lying to yourself and it’s not funny! 😜

The Secret Blog of a 30 Year Old

X X X X X 

Why is the kitchen not the kitchen room?! 

This post is a bit strange, but then again I’m sure there’s no surprise there! I was thinking that every room in the house has the word “room” at the end of it. You have bedrooms, bathrooms, living rooms, dining rooms….what about the kitchen? 

My other half thinks it stems from ye olden times where the kitchen was considered a place for the maids and cooks etc so it wouldn’t of been classed as a room. This does kinda make sense but it still strange. 

The kitchen is the heart of our home it’s the most used room by far, and I felt sorry for it not being classed as a ‘room’ so I decided to start calling it the kitchen room. Sadly this lasted about 20 minutes as I kept forgetting but I give myself a good B+ for effort.

Do you know any more about this topic?! 

I’d love to hear in the comments below!

The Secret Blog of a 30 Year Old

X X X X X 

4 posties, a sex toy and a few gallons of diesel…(I’m insane)

If you read my blog post The great transformers hunt was on (the things we do for our kids) I’m sure you will have gathered how determined I can be! Today was one of those ‘mountain moving days.’ The kids are at my mums for the night and me and my other half had a night of dirty love making planned. We had ordered something to go along with said dirty love making. However I missed the delivery. 

At that point I had two choices, accept the night was ruined, or find that parcel. As I’m super woman today I chose the latter. 

The hunt was on. 

The crazy, stalker, ‘woman possessed’ came out of me and I was on a mission. I wanted my dirty love making and no early delivering postie (that’s short for postman) was going to ruin that!!! 

I started like most crazy people do, I drove around the streets looking for the postie. My detective skills kicked in, I knew that there is one guy who does the letters and another that does the parcels, they both come and go in the same van. So if I could find one, I could find the other. 

After a good half an hour I was having no luck, so my next step was to drive to the main post office, where the note through my door said it would be tomorrow. Tomorrow was no good, the kids are back then, I needed it today. 

I spoke to a very nice lady who said I might be able to get it tonight but she couldn’t promise anything. So that was my back up plan. But she did suggest keeping an eye out on the way home. I took that as “keep looking you’ll find him” so off I went. 

I tried a different road on the way home and spotted a postie!!!! Not my one, but a postie all the same. So like the lunatic I am I shout out the window if he knows where my parcel could be. He was actually pretty nice about it, I’m guessing I’m not the first to go to these extremes, he says after my area they’ll be in a different part of town, which he gave me directions to.

I had a lead!!!! 

The excitement kicked in again and I flew in my mummy wagon to where they could be, as I’m driving down a long main road I get stuck in traffic lights and guess who drives past me in the opposite direction THE POSTIES!!!! 

At this point I’m screaming and concidering crashing my car to get out of the traffic and onto the other side of this road. As I’m debating if that’s a bit over the top or not the lights change to green and I’m off! I turn around at a round about but my heart sinks as I realised I’ve lost them.

My brain has fireworks as I realise they’re heading to the big post office!!!!!! As I get closer I see a lady postie that I’ve seen delivering near our house before so I pull over to harass her too, she was so kind to me (probably because I looked wild eyed and rather sweaty) she told me she wasn’t delivery to me today and how It’s nearly the end of the other posties shift so they will be back at the big post office soon. 

As she says this they drive past!!!! The lady postie must be as nuts as me, she starts jumping and pointing “ahhh that’s them go go go!!!” I didn’t need any encouragement, I did a U turn in the middle of the road, blocked them in as they parked and….

Got my fucking parcel!!!!!! 

So after an hour and a half, I had achieved!! My god was I smug, I had done the impossible! 

When was the last time you chased a postie?! I’d love to hear in the comments below!

The Secret Blog of a 30 Year Old

X X X X X 

Small victories with my four year old (special story)

My youngest is 4 years old, he will be 5 in July. He has a speech delay which has recently massively improved through daily speech therapy at school since being full time. When he was younger he had the therapy weekly but it didn’t make much of a difference. It’s only been the past few months strangers are starting to understand him, which is amazing and is making him a happy little boy. 

For a long time he got very upset and frustrated as I was the only one that could understand him. This broke my heart. He had the mind of a 4 Year Old but the speech of a 2 Year Old. It was extremely hard for him and I couldn’t be prouder of my lovely boy and how his speech is getting better everyday. What has also been amazing, is that in the beginning of the school year he was in the “slower pace” learning groups (they thought due to his speech he would struggle), after two terms he had worked his way up to the top groups in all areas of learning. I cried at home after finding this out as I was so worried his speech would hold him back. He’s so bright and I’m ecstatic he is able to express that now. 

However, we have had huge hurdles in other areas at home. Mainly in hygiene. Washing himself, washing his hair, water in general, teeth brushing, hair cutting, toe nail clipping, ear cleaning….all of these things he found petrifying. Some he still does, this has been just awful if I’m honest. With our eldest daughter none of these things have ever been an issue so it’s been even more tricky figuring out what to do to help him over come these fears. 

It has been my goal the past year to solve these issues, as all these things you have to do. I can’t not wash his bits or let him grow claws on his little feet. It’s taken lots of tiny baby steps and lot of tears, talking and bribing but we’re getting there. 

Last night I had to tackle the biggest issue…hair washing. Hair cutting is still a big issue but is tonnes better than what he was. He is due a hair cut, I tend to keep it as short as possible so it’s easier to give his head a quick scrub. But where we’ve been busy and his hair grows so fast it has gotten longish again. Where it’s been so hot and sweaty this week he hair was really starting to smell and I thought the time is now I can’t put it off any more.

I’ll be the first to say hair washing is the one thing I’ve not been consistent with, it makes me feel like a really bad parent but whenever I wash his hair no matter how i do it he is hysterical and I have to physically hold him in the bath. Which is so traumatising. I can’t put into words how horrible it is, it’s far more than just a few tears. I was doing it regularly hoping he would get used to it but it was making him truly scared of bath times. So I gave up for a while. But last night we turned a corner. 

I actually managed to wash his hair without tears!!!! He had a cry before we did it, I gave him lots of options how how to do it so he felt In control and for the first time it bloody worked. At first he refused, I then suggested why not just wash the back of his hair, which agreed to. On the condition I used a flannel not a cup of water to rinse and that I leant over the bath and cuddled his head so he could cuddle my arm. So this is what we did, and while constantly telling him what a big boy he was and how proud of him I was I gradually moved the flannel up until his whole head of hair was washed. I could of cried I was so relieved. I also kept telling him how lovely his hair smelt and his dad made a big fuss of him too. 

This might sound like a really small thing, but for my little man this was HUGE!! It’s all about the little victories and I’m so proud of him. 

The Secret Blog of a 30 Year Old 

X X X X X 

Dying my suede boots DIY

I recently bought a £50 pair of light grey ankle boots, I ordered them online and as soon as I saw them I knew I would never wear them. They were sooooo light in colour they made me feet look huge, I also couldn’t get used to something being on my feet that wasn’t black or leopard print! Stupidly I wore them outside so knew I couldn’t return them. I tried my best to get used to them but it wasn’t happening. 

After them living in my shoes cupboard for a month I thought fuck it lets dye them! Something I hadn’t tried before, I did feel bad as they were £50 but I wasn’t wearing them anyway so was worth a shot. 

This is the dye I bought:

I was concerned i might of needed two boxes but was pleasantly surprised that it was just enough! 

A few things I would definitely recommend,:

  • WEAR GLOVES this stuff stains like a bitch I’m so pleased I did! 
  • What ever you put the dye in when you pour it out the bottle also really stains so use an old bowl you can just throw away after. 
  • As I’m a cocky so and so I decided against taping up the edges of the soles, instead I used a tiny paint brush for the edges, this worked like a charm. But I am used to painting in detail so if your not maybe give the tape a go as well as the brush.
  • This is addictive i actually am thinking of buying all my shoes in the wrong colour just to dye them. 

Overall it was not as hard as I thought it would be and I really enjoyed the experience! Any questions please comment below!

The Secret Blog of a 30 Year Old

X X X X X 

Annoying things about cooking dinners (rant)

I am sick to fucking death of trying to figure out what everyone wants for dinner!!!! Here are the things that drive me crazy, we’ve gone bullet point style today as there are so many!

  • I’m sick of food shopping and handing over my well earned cash week after week.
  • I’m sick of remembering to bring my shopping bags when I go shopping. 
  • I’m sick of putting the food shopping away.
  • I’m sick of forgetting one essential ingredient to every meal I have planned that week.
  • I’m sick of asking what people want for dinner, buying what they ask, then they don’t want it. 
  • I’m sick of being told “I don’t mind what we’re having for dinner cook what ever you want” then once dinner  is cooked they moaned that don’t want to eat it or don’t feel like that meal tonight. TOUGH SHIT YOUR EATING IT!
  • I’m sick hearing “this takes weird I’m not eating it” when it’s the same thing I’ve bought and cooked for years.
  • I’m sick of cooking everyone different dinners.
  • I’m sick of adapting a meal four different fucking ways so everyone will eat it. 
  • I have one child that won’t eat sauce or any other meat than chicken.
  • I have one child that won’t eat veg or meat full stop. 
  • My other half won’t eat maybe 80% of the worlds food choices. 
  • I’m sick of slaving away for hours on a meal when it takes less than 10 minutes to eat it. 
  • I’m sick of peeling and chopping veg. 
  • I’m sick of multi tasking while cooking e.g. Boiling, frying, oven cooking, making sauces, chopping meat and veg all the same time, its bloody draining!!

Ahhhhhhhhh tell me what you hate about dinners in the comments below!! 

The Secret Blog of a 30 Year Old