Things I worried about being pregnant and what I would say to myself now

I have two children so I feel quite experienced in this subject matter. I remember the first time I was pregnant having so many worries, that got me thinking about what I would say to myself if I could. This blog post idea was then born! So here are some of the worries I had while being pregnant for the first time, and my response now.

What if I forget I have a baby and leave them in a shop?

I remember this haunting my dreams, what if I forgot my baby!! If I could go back I would say to myself, with pure hearted honesty, this WILL NOT happen. That baby will come first before anything you will never forget them. You might want to walk out of a shop after they’ve been crying for 3 hours in protest, but you will not forget your baby. 

What if the baby gets too hot or too cold?

I had a strange obsession that I wouldn’t know if my baby would be too hot or too cold and that I wouldn’t know. Quite random I know. I remember some advice my friend gave me, if your hot or cold the baby more and likely will be too, they’ll get red cheeks if they’re hot and they’ll feel cold to the touch if they’re cold. They will also more than likely cry to let you know if there’s something they’re not happy with. I would tell myself to listen to my friend as all of that was true! 

What if I have a mutant baby that even I can’t love?

This one is a rather taboo subject but I know for a fact that a lot of first time mums worry about this. What if my baby is hideous? My advice would be, even if that baby is green, covered head to toe in scales and has 10 eyes you will still think it is the most beautiful baby ever born. You’ll think the green scales and multiple eyes are just adorable and so cute. You might look at baby photos years later and think hmmm they actually looked a bit funny but I promise you when that babies first born you won’t!

What if I’m literally ripped in half pushing this baby out and I’m left with nothing but one giant hole you could fit a tree trunk in?

This is a very common worry with new mums, maybe not the tree trunk bit but that your ‘downstairs’ will be changed forever and will always be a giant flappy hole. I would say to myself, after laughing at the hysteria, that you will be amazed at how quick it will all snap back. One baby will not destroy your bits or your sex life. Even after two my lady garden is good to go, and my second baby was 10 pounds and I needed stitches front and back! 5 babies might do some damage but your fine with one or two!

Will I cope in labour?

This really is one thing I WISH I could go back in time and tell myself. I was petrified of the thought that this baby had to come out. Even my second pregnant I was terrified, but the first was definitely the biggest of worries as you have no idea what to expect. I was a total wimp at that point in my life, I was quite young and and would cry over a paper cut so I had no idea how I was going to cope with a human coming out of me. I would say to myself:

YOU WILL BE THE BOSS OF LABOUR!!!! The first labour will only be a couple of hours, you will be in agony, your head will be FUCKED as that little person slips out of you but you will do great! You’ll do the whole thing with no pain relief and no drugs and be so proud you could scream it from the roof tops. You won’t melt down, you won’t abuse the staff, you won’t freak out and die, you’ll get on with the job at hand and get that shit done. You will be that amazing in fact when you have your second child the midwife will joke she should of recorded you to show “what the perfect attitude to labour can be like” second time round you’ll be laughing and joking in between contractions and be so excited to meet your second little one. My advice to all new mums worrying about this….the second you see that baby you won’t care what you just had to go through. If I had to go through labour every day of my life to have my kiddies I would, they were worth every excruciating second and I wouldn’t change a thing.

I would love to hear in the comments below what your worries were, or if you pregnant now if you have any questions leave them in the comments below!

The Secret Blog of a 30 Year Old 

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  1. Loved this! I had completely different worries, all of them vain. Like how will my body change, will I get stretch marks, what happens to my boobs?! Now I would tell myself to get over it and that I will literally not give a hoot about any thing vain. You should have seen the grease ball hair I was sporting in work today! I’m not even bothered 😂

    Liked by 1 person

      • Ok, ok, I confess…it was straightened so I could wear it down and have my long locks blowing in the wind, but by the time I got devil child in the car my hair was scraped back in a pony 😀 It’s far too windy for that carry on! I’v got ‘baby’ hairs regrowing after it all fell out with having a baby and all. So don’t worry, I have a halo of wispy hair all around my face – I look like shit so people still recognise me.
        I think I prefer when it’s greasy, at least the baby hairs don’t tickle my face xx

        Liked by 1 person

      • Haha I knew you weren’t having a perfect hair day! That would make u far too immaculate for my liking! Aw no bless u, that’s ok Hun, even more reason to keep it greasy! I’m relieved ppl still recognise u though, that could of really confused everyone around u! 😂 I have just been swimming, so instead of a cute curly hair high pony I have the drowned rat chlorine look going on that I rock so well. Xxx

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Brilliant! I often wish I’d had someone to talk about my worries when I was pregnant, would that have prevented me getting post-natal depression afterwards?

    I worried that my stomach could only stretch so far, and the baby would come bursting out like a scene from Alien! I had nightmares about it, but luckily after getting through my first pregnancy that one went and didn’t bother me in my second one.

    I worried that I wouldn’t be able to look after my baby, but in fact having kids has been the making of me and I’ve learned to stand up for them in a way I never was able to stand up for myself.

    I had a “mutant baby”! OK, he’s not green, but my son has a rare chromosome disorder caused by a random mutation. So I’d add, even though no one ever wishes for a disabled child, because everyone wants their kids to be fit and healthy and not face unnecessary struggles, if you do have a child with a disability they will teach you so much about love, human nature and sheer bloody mindedness that it will be worth any difficulties you have to go through to get them support. You’ll find you’re stronger than you know. Xx

    Liked by 1 person

    • Heya thank you so much for commenting!! I was severely post natal for about two years so I don’t think it would of done!

      I did laugh at ur tummy exploding but totally get where you were coming from!!

      That’s amazing it’s been the making of u, I feel exactly the same. I’m the person I always wanted to be but never thought I could.

      I really hope you didn’t take offence to the mutant bit it was meant to be a joke but I’m so sorry if it offended you. You sound like an amazing mum and your kids are lucky to have such a loving strong parent xxxx

      Liked by 1 person

      • Noooo – don’t worry, I absolutely didn’t take offence. We joke as a family about him being a mutant like the X Men (he wants to get super speed as his super power, but I tell him he already has super caring for others.) I do think it needs talking about. I didn’t even consider the possibility of a disabled child when I was pregnant and a lot of the info they do give you is worst case scenario, so you end up in fear and dread. I know many parents of disabled kids, some far more affected than my son, and we all say we wish people had talked about the positives as well as the risks. Xx

        Liked by 1 person

      • Phew my heart sank when I thought it might of offended you!! I think I might change the wording in my post as I was more referring to physical appearance rather than disability. (I remember my friend crying when she was first pregnant and hormonal asking if she would still love her baby if it was ginger!!!) In part two I might mention disability as it is another big worry, I remember me and my other half having very conflicted opinions on the topic it wasn’t good. Aww bless your son that’s so sweet! X men are awesome! I totally agree, it is all worst case scenarios they never discuss the inbetween which is a big chunk of lives to miss off the check list! Xxx

        Liked by 1 person

      • The physical stuff is important too – when my daughter was born and I rang to tell my mam the first thing I said was “I’ve had the baby, she’s got straight hair!” I’ve always hated having curly hair, so that seemed in the moment the most important feature 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • Aw haha it is funny what u think and say straight after! I’m really fair skinned and blonde and was pretty much bald until I was two lol so wasn’t expecting my first born to have a tonne of dark hair when she came our! The first thing I said was “oh the babies got hair!!” And about half hour later when I came out of the shock cloud I asked ” is the baby a boy or a girl?!” 😂 In that half hour I didn’t hear a word anyone said to me as I was just staring at my baby girl! Xxx

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