I have always loved makeup. Everything about it made me happy, from choosing what to buy to the packaging the colours the textures the application…. it literally melted my heart. Because of this I have ended up with a huge collection which takes up half of the bedroom, my other half thinks I’m nuts but I didn’t care. Makeup was my passion and a way for me to express myself and be creative, I loved collecting certain pieces and more than that I loved wearing it. Applying it was so relaxing and enjoyable for me, if I had the time I would spend hours on my face.
Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t feel like I HAD to wear makeup I wore it purely for the love of it. If I didn’t feel like wearing it one day I wouldn’t, thankfully my job doesn’t involve me looking perfect all the time so it really was for my benefit only.
Over time I started getting into the beauty community online, YouTube and blogs became a fun way to kill time. As I loved makeup so much and had really strong opinions to what I did and didn’t like and why I did or didn’t like them, I decided to start a beauty blog. I loved writing and thought what better way to combine my passions. As I do with everything I threw myself in full force, spending HOURS upon HOURS on researching, buying, wearing, testing, photographing, writing, editing and website building. Bearing in mind I’m a mum of two, I have a popular business from home as well as two other small part time jobs my life is hectic and busy but I found the time and loved what I was doing.
But slowly over time this changed, instead of makeup being a fun hobby it felt like something I “had” to do. I wasn’t making money from it in any way so it wasn’t a financial pressure, it was more of a pressure I put on myself not to give up and “fail” at something else, I didn’t want this to be another fad. As well as readers and friends who followed my blog asking questions when I wasn’t posting as much, this started taking its toll on me. I couldn’t just enjoy my make up collection any more, I felt like I had to try out new products all the time and that by wearing the products I knew and loved it was almost like a waste of time as I should be trying out new things to review.
I’m going to quickly fill you in on how time consuming beauty blogging became in bullet points:
- Buy new products and add my ‘new products box’
- Chose which products will work well together from my ‘new products box’
- Apply makeup
- Makes notes on the application and my first impressions
- Photograph the products I used
- Photograph myself with the makeup on
- Edit photos
- Post photos on all social media including tags and links to products used
- Take notes throughout the day on how each product wore/lasted/looked like etc.
- Repeat process until I felt confidant in my opinion of the product.
- Draft blog post
- Add photos
- Edit what I have written
- Edit what I have written
- (One last time) Edit what I have written
- Publish post after one final check
- Notify on all social media including photos, links and tags.
- Then repeat
Even typing this process out I feel drained, literally drained. All the joy was sucked from my passion, if I tried wearing makeup for the fun of it I would just feel guilty and find myself taking bloody photos and taking a few notes!! I can’t get out of this loop, it just makes me feel sad if I’m really honest. I also found financially it was getting harder, every spare penny I had was going on make-up, I was missing out on so much just to buy the latest eye shadow palette or foundation. I knew it would be hard work but I was struggling to fit it all in, my own businesses services can be fairly seasonal so when I was busy (working days and evenings as well as having my two kiddies and a partner that worked full time long hours) I simply didn’t have time to go through the whole process which again made me feel like I was failing.
Yet I feel this experience has taught me a lot, from a tech point of view I’ve learnt how to manoeuvre wordpress and understand how the platform works. My makeup skills have seriously improved as well as the time it takes it to apply it. I have found some fantastic make up products I would not of otherwise found. Starting my writing again was so exciting and reminded me of how much I love it, even if I was writing about makeup and skincare, by that i mean its fairly limiting creativity wise.
Through this process I realised that after years of working, having babies, trying to lose weight, and generally getting on with life….that I still love writing. Ive just not been writing about the right things, and this is the purpose of this blog I have now. Here is a place I come to write WHATEVER I want, whenever I want, how ever I want. I wouldn’t of gotten to this point if it wouldn’t of been for my beauty blog. And for that I’m thankful.
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